Uncomfortable

What are the things you hope no one knows? The things you keep hidden so you do not appear imperfect? My word this year is uncomfortable, which is challenging to say the least. Here are some things that I struggle with:

I hope no one knows I take anxiety medication so my Lupus does not flare due to stress.

I wish my house was updated and an interior designer would come in to paint the walls and decorate.

My marriage is one big fight from being over.

My body is never good enough and I compare all the time.

I may be teacher of the year, but my test scores are always lacking and I feel that one day I will be punished because I cannot get them higher.

I am infertile and I question if it has to do with the sin of my past.

I worry most about failing as a mom with his weight, screen time, education and work ethic.

I struggle with a shopping addiction and get distracted with social media.

I hope no one ever sees what is really in my heart.

I had to take out a loan to pay for a massive amount of debt.

I am an imperfect person in need of a perfect Savior.

Maybe you are, too.

Firework Waste

What is it with fireworks that make people lose their minds? We live out in the country where popping all explosives is legal. Every New Year and July 4th my house sounds like a war zone. This is not how I was raised. We watched them, but never popped them so seeing this excitement for fire is beyond me.

Personally, they are a waste of money. I said it!

However, the smile it brings my son to hold the lighter and watch it go off. The anticipation of what the firecracker will do…how high…how loud….the colors. He loves it all. The joy my husband feels to put on a show and share that explosion together…it is special.

I pace back and forth ready for the injury, the fire, the accident and 911 call. I am not a fireworks girl-but my boys are so we light em up. Truth is that hour of memories is no different then a dinner night out or buying fancy liquor to drink. You consume it and it is gone. You have nothing left but a memory and maybe a picture, but in that moment it was everything and nowhere else you would rather be.

So rather than be a fireworks waste, I will choose to say fireworks win last night. Memories to last a lifetime and maybe share with his family someday. Happy 4th of July!

Pomifera Skincare Line

I might be addicted…it is hard to say. However, I love the feel and smell of this skincare line so I keep coming back.

I do not sell it

Everything I say here is as a customer only. But when you find something you like then you share it. For instance, I love Jesus so I share my testimony of his goodness and grace. I love skincare products that make me feel like I am trying not to look over 41 so I share it.

As you can see…I buy it a lot. But I will share my fave 3 used most often.

1. Precleanse spray. I struggle to wash my face so their spray helps me out by doing the tough job without the cold water.

Exfoliant. My face is rough and this scrub feels like microdermabrasion. It gets to the core of removing dead skin to reveal the soft stuff underneath.

Healing body oil with the radiant hair oil scent. The smell makes me feel rich while the oil repairs sun damage and my face soaks it all up to stay hydrated.

Honorable mention is the peppermint face wash and my newest product is a citrus face lotion. Again, I am a scent girl! Comment if interested in a link to see prices, reviews and learn more…but again…I do not sell it so I get nothing in return!

Growing old is tough. It is harder when men (aka my husband) seem to get better with time. We ladies gotta do what we can to stay young or at least feel young. Being proactive by taking care of my skin is the first step.

I also find I do my best self care over summer, but hopefully will build habits that carry over!

Adopting in a Pandemic

As we restart our adoption journey, but this time through foster care, one major difference is all the courses available online. We lose the community…we loved our adoption community and still keep in touch with those families…but learning in your pajamas is pretty awesome too. In fact, doing the courses online is one of the big reasons the fire was lit to start. I learned today even CPR was online so that is pretty amazing also! I say all this to say if you have been praying about adoption then now is the time!

On another note, Happy Law Enforcement Day!

The biggest reason my husband got out of police work, is we adopted our son. Now we had a baby to care for and working nights, weekends, holidays just would not work anymore. He struggled that he was missing all the good stuff needing to sleep so he could go to work. He also realized the reality that he could be hurt or killed while on the job and there were other things he could do…so he resigned and started a new career.

Staying married while doing that job was hard, so I will always have respect for those that serve others and risk their lives for strangers.

How do you show love to your spouse?

I love my spouse, but how we each show and receive love is very different. I am a quality time girl. Love to me is snuggles on the couch, date nights, sleeping in late, vacations to the beach. In short: time!

My husband is very different. He is Acts of Service. Love to him is work. He likes a clean house, a chore that needs to be done, working on a project together to get it done faster. Productivity and progress makes his day! So clearly we are different, so how do we make it work?

Step 1 is recognizing how the other receives love and doing it graciously. This is hard for me since I like to be comfortable and lazy. Step 2 is accepting just because we are giving, does not mean the other is receiving. I am on Cloud 9 on a date night, but he might be feeling nothing so I have to remember though my love tank is full…he still has room to be filled which means I have to be intentional about showing love even after a great night.

It is hard when two languages are so different but worth it when the marriage is working and growing. The question I have to keep asking is “Am I giving as much as I am receiving?” If I can honestly answer no then time to get to work!